Milo, showing me his latest Tinkertoy invention: “Look, Mom! This wrecker destroyer has SIX zappers on it. So if Morris tries to destroy you again, I can protect you.”
Morris, who had been sitting quietly in my lap, turns and points a Tinkertoy lollipop at my face: “Zap! Zap! Zap! Zap! Zap!”
Me (fist bumping with Milo and Morris): “Wonder Twin powers, activate!”
Milo: “Wonder Twin Powers, pizzavate!”
Morris: “Wonder Toon Power, bongo bake!”
Rob: “You guys are weird.”
Morris, jumping on my bed as I try to work: “I’m a naked dude! I’m a naked dude! I rock and roll!”
Morris: “Mommy, I have something in my ear.”
Me: “You have something in your ear?”
Morris: “Mm hmm. Something in my big ear.”
Me: “You have something in your big ear.”
Morris: “Mm hmm. It’s a crocodile. Can I have a lollipop?”
Milo: “Knock knock.”
Me: “Who’s there?”
Milo: “Eye.”
Me: “Eye who?”
Milo: “Eye’ll be back in the eye socket later. A-ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
———–
Milo: “Knock knock.”
Me: “Who’s there?”
Milo: “Seal.”
Me: “Seal who?”
Milo: “Seal later alligator! A-ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
—————–
Morris: “Knock knock.”
Me: “Who’s there?”
Morris: “Seal.”
Me: “Seal who?”
Morris: “Seal phlllllbbbbt!!!! A-ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
——————
Rob: “Knock knock.”
Me: “Who’s there?”
Rob: “Interrupting zombie.”
Me: “Interr–”
Rob: “BRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAINS! A-ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
Morris: “Mommy, we bought you.” .
Me: “You bought me?”
Morris: “Mm hmm.”
Me: “Like, in the grocery store?”
Morris: “Mm hmm.”
Me: “Did you buy me in the fruit and vegetables section or the cheese section?”
Morris: “The cheese section.”
Me: “That’s what I figured.”
Morris: “Mommy, I love my nose.”
Me: “Your nose?”
Morris: “Mm hmm. It’s so cool.”
Me: “Um, sure, your nose is very cool. Uhhh… why do you think your nose is cool?”
Morris (pointing to nose): “Because it’s so fast!”
Morris: “Mommy?”
Me: “Yes, Morris?”
Morris: “Mommy?”
Me: “Yes, Morris?”
Morris: “Mommy?”
Me: “Yes, Morris?”
Morris: “Mommy?”
Me: “Yes, Morris?”
Morris: “Mommy?”
Me: “YES, Morris?”
Morris: “I so funny?”
Me: “Yes, Morris, you’re so funny.”
Morris: “BAHAHAHAHAHAHA!”
Morris, while I’m changing his dirty diaper: “Mom, I love my poo.”
Me: “Oh you do, do you?”
Morris: “Mm hmm. Want to hug it.”
Me: “Really.”
Morris: “Mm hmm. Want to smell it.”
Me: “You want to smell it.”
Morris: “I want to smell it! I want to smell it! I want to smell it!”
Me: “Okay, okay! There. Can you smell it?”
Morris: “Mm hmm.”
Me: “Pretty stinky, huh?”
Morris: “Pretty stinky.”
Morris: “Mommy, may I get down?”
Me: “Yes, you may.”
Morris: “I may?”
Me: “Yes, you may.”
Morris: “I may?”
Me: “Yes, you may.”
Morris: “I may?”
Me: “YES, you may.”
Morris: “I not may! I Morris.”
