Posts Tagged: Morris – 2 years old
Morris: “Does Wolverine have claws?”
Me: “Yes, he does! Big claws.”
Morris: “Does he scratch with them?”
Me: “Yep. That’s what he does.”
Morris: “Does he scratch his elbow?”
Me: “Um, sometimes, probably.”
Morris: “Does he scratch his back?”
Me: “If it’s itchy, I guess.”
Morris: “Does he sing?”
Me: “Wolverine, sing? Maybe.”
Morris: “What does he sing?”
Me: “I don’t know. What do you think Wolverine sings?”
Morris: “Spider Man! Spins a web any size, catches thieves just like flies, yeah!”
Morris: “Mommy. Mommy. Mommy. Mommy! MOMMY!!!”
Me: “Yes?”
Morris: “You’re a chopstick.”
Morris, holding up a rotini impaled on his fork: “This is a slug.”
Me: “Oh, really.”
He eats the noodle then stabs another one and holds it up. “This is a slug, too.”
Me: “Ooooh, that’s a green one. What do green slugs taste like?”
Milo: “Like poo.”
Morris smiles and pops the rotini in his mouth.
Me: “So? What did it taste like?”
Morris: “Strawberries!”
Morris: “Mommy, I’m glad Daddy’s not dead.”
Me: “Me too, honey.”
Rob: “Me too!”
Morris: “If Daddy died, he would be a zombie.”
Milo: “Yeah, and all he’d ever make for dinner would be brain soup. And we’d be all, ‘bleaaaah!’ whenever he tried to make us eat it.”
Morris: “Brain soup isn’t good for me! I like apple poop. Uh huh! Apple poop is very, VERY good for me.”
Morris: “Mommy, can I have a snack?”
Me: “No, you already had a snack. You had that graham cracker.”
Morris: “I don’t want a graham cracker!”
Me: “But it’s already in your belly.”
Morris: “Then get it out!”
Me: “How?”
Morris: “First we screw my belly, then we hammer it, then we open it up and take it out.”
Me: “All right, then, you get the screwdriver and the hammer and we’ll get right on that.”
Morris: “Oh what fun it is to poop in a one-butt open poop poop poopy poop poop butt!”
Milo: “Hey, little Mor-baby, Mor-baby, Mor-baby.”
Morris: “No! Don’t call me that!”
Milo: “How about Mor-toddler, then?”
Morris: “No!”
Milo: “How about Mor-boy?”
Morris: “NO!”
Me: “How about Mor-ris?”
Morris: “NO!!!”
Me: “Well, if we can’t call you Morris, what should we call you?”
Milo: “How about Spike Dude?”
Morris: “Yeah!”
At the dinner table…
Morris holds up his clenched fist and blinks his large blue eyes at me. “Mommy, would you like a knuckle sandwich?”
Morris: “Mommy, where does Saint Sponge Bob live?”
Overheard from downstairs…
Milo: “Hey, Morris, you want to come read a book with me?”
Morris: “Okay!”
Milo: “Okay, come on, let’s go read a book.”
