Morris: “I hear ambulance! Maybe somebody hurt!”
Milo, showing his clenched fist: “Maybe someone has a hole in them THIS big.”
Me: “How would they get a hole that big in them?”
Milo: “Maybe there was a monster with huge claws and it just went ‘HAAAA!” (stabs imaginary victim) “… and the person went ‘Aaaaagh, I need an ambulance.'”
Me: “Well, that does seem like the likeliest option.”
Morris: “If I take my belly apart, monsters come out my belly. Yeah!”
Overheard from downstairs…
Milo: “You’re not the boss of me.”
Morris: “Yes, I am.”
Milo: “No, you’re not! I’m your older brother. I’m the boss of you!”
Morris: “NO YOU’RE NOT! I’M BOSS OF YOU!”
Milo: “No! That’s not the way it works!”
Morris: “YES, IT IS! I’M BOSS OF YOU!”
Milo: “No, you’re NOT!”
Morris: “You want a piece of me?”
Milo: “Sure. You want a piece of me?”
Morris: “Yeah!”
… Giggles ensue.
Me, attempting to explain evolution in simple terms: “Over long periods of time, plants and animals change in relation to the changing world around them.”
Milo: “You mean I’m going to turn into a dinosaur? Cool!”
Me: “No, dinosaurs died out millions of years ago. But the tiny mice-like creatures that lived back then eventually evolved to become us.”
Milo: “You mean I used to be a mouse? Cool!”
Me: “Well, actually, those tiny mice became all sorts of different creatures, one of which was a creature like a monkey, and that monkey eventually evolved to become us.”
Milo: “You mean I’m half-mouse, half-monkey? THAT’S SO AWESOME!”
Overheard from downstairs:
Milo, speaking as a robot: “I – LOVE – YOU – MORRIS.”
Morris: “I – LOVE – YOU – TOO – MILO. ROBOT! ROBOT! ROBOT!”
Morris, while doing naked interpretive ballet during the singing of the pre-game national anthem: “My feet are geekin’! My feet are geekin’!”
Milo: “Daddy, what does ‘N-H-L’ spell?”
Morris: “Mommy, what’s your name?”
Me: “My name is Erin.”
Morris: “No! What’s Daddy’s name?”
Me: “His name is Robert.”
Morris: “What’s Milo’s name?”
Me: “His name is Milo.”
Morris: “What’s my name?”
Me: “Your name is Morris.”
Morris: “No! My name is Glee!”
Me: “Your name is Glee?”
Morris: “Yes! GLEEEEEEEE!”
Me: “Well, okay then.”
Morris, calling from his crib upon awakening from his nap: “I pooped the gum out! I pooped the gum out! MOOOOOMMY!!! I POOPED THE GUM OUT!!!”
Me: “You’re handsome.”
Morris: “No.”
Me: “You’re cute.”
Morris: “No, I NOT cute.”
Me: “You’re goooooood-lookin’.”
Morris: “No!”
Me: “You’re a little hunk.”
Morris, standing up: “I NOT a little hunk! I’m a BIG hunk!”
